what's in me~

171111, thurs... Clear night

Since last week till now, I started to enjoy swimming. Working out. All such making me to have some lil desire to walk on daily. At least something healthy huh? I think so... Seriously, I sux in swimming but I just enjoyed the moment I dive in the pool. It feels I'm being covered. Not alone. Well, this is all I desire in my life, having someone to pampered me and showered me with sincere love. That's all. Well, it seems tough to fulfill this. So, lil diving in pool does satisfied me since it's unreachable for now or maybe not at all, anymore.

Previously I remembered that I said I could not find myself back, if you ask me, have I found it now?

I will say, maybe yes... Maybe no.. (at least better than not at all right?) anyway, I still heading to no where as at now. Flowing with time. I never ever dare to dream much of my route, as I planned too much and hoping too much had drown me twice. Phobia and conflict within myself.

And it's going to be the end of the year which suppose to be the best happening time of the year. However, it's seems pretty dull to me. I wished dt I'm not alone during Christmas Eve and New Year Eve.

If only... Hmmm

Lonely,

Vinns