'Empty' Home

*070911, weds…clear night*

Upon today is Day 1 of Presentation of my 1^st module to users, somehow it was aint that bad. So far so good as its first day, pretty basic though.

Till late evening, my day seems getting darker. In sudden, unbalance emotions cover up my soul partial when the coincidence of your appearance through my glance.

Pretty glad that seeing you living happily yet very lovely with your loves ones. Indeed, felt happy for you but don’t why, right at the corner, I feel my heart is kinda heavy. Mood was turned down. Hmmm.. I thinking tooooo much.. Hope I could pull myself out COMPLETELY, as it was HISTORY that will never going to be repeated anymore.

My day was getting even more deep in darkness when I made an intention to call back home. At first intention, I thought of asking and care about them. However, when I speak to my lil sis, she was telling me something but was being stopped. I was dissatisfied, why do they need to stop her from telling me something?

Thus, I pursue her and gotta to know what she is trying to tell me. Sighhh… even such a small girl, knows what I don’t like. How come they don’t know? Heart even felt more aching…

One very simple question;

“If you have a home which you had stayed there since you are a child, you are brought up there and after so long, you gotta to know that your room was taken and you required to pack your things in order to let other ppl could have the room. Lastly, the only place that is reserved for you is A CUPBOARD which packed with your clothes, your privacy stuffs, your lovely books and your everything. That’s the ONLY thing belong to you wholly in the House.

Yes indeed, A Cupboard.

Share with me, HOW DO YOU FEEL???”

Hmm… Just because that I’m away from home for 3 months plus, things change drastically. I could barely imagine such things happened. To judge my status in family and home, I could clearly see it and feeling it.

What is it that meant to be if someone does not even have a room in family house? Does someone still meant to be at home or even coming bak home when there’s no more home?

Stay strong, Vinns…

That’s the ONLY thing that I afford to say

Speechless,

Vinns

d Lost that Rise^^

*060911, tues..cloudy day*

As usual a daily routine of busy day. Walk around, do some work, and today I shared some of my past with a close colleague which drives me bak the moment I being endured by a special person in my life when I was in my teens life. However, the person walked out from my life about 6 to 7 years ago. Yet I glad that The One did as The One deserve a better life.

Well, as usual go for lunch with bunch of colleagues, with bursting laughter. After lunch, getting back on track to work. In sudden, there’s a call with ‘Blocked’ name. Being suspicious who is that, thinking sure those ppl doing research and this that as it happened before. Maybe is SG market.

Once I picked up, the voice asking am I Yan Ni in Cantonese, the voice was sooooooooo familiar. I knew that its THE ONE but I could not believe it!!! Impossible!!! I was like stunned for few second with any respond and then repeated “are you---??”

The One said, “Which one are you referring too?? Do you really know who am I?”

I said, “Its You, I know…but how come??? How you know my SG number?? How did you get it??? OMG, I could not belief its you!!!...”

The One said,”Ohhh.. you still remember me? How come you still remember??”

I said, “Impossible, that I will forget you as you meant a lot to me since young…”

The word, “unbelievable”.. keeps on playing our an hour conversation. Getting to know each other after lost in touch for 6 plus years was indeed meaningful.

Feeling so relief that The One is indeed happier and having a very much better living that The One deserve compare to previous environment. The Warm concern and talks were totally remarkable, yet could not believe how did The One got my SG number which normally only my colleagues will have it.

Right after the call end, I sat down. My feeling was unstable. Excitement, warm, unbelievable and etc was ALL IN ONE! Someone who meant so so so much to me, which I tot The One will be forever gone and will not appear in my life anymore… and Today, the one blooms~

No words could describe how I feel right now, right this second…So delightful!^^

How I wish that we could be as close as before…

I will be praying for you and your happiness..

You will be always remarkable in my life as you shower my young days with colour…

Always loving you in heart…

Happily,

Vinns

A Long Lost Family Day

230809,sun..sunny day..woke up at 12.30pm..kinda late huh?..haha..aikz..jz so tired de..den look around the hz for food..finally, end up wif instant noodle too..aikz..bout 2pm,aunt ask me to join a 'family outing'..and guess wad? walao~~went out wif aunt,dad,akak,relatives and a bunch of small kids to FEED FISHES and TURTLES..swt~~seems so harmonic man..walau~~ looking at those small kids, lik so innocent..running here and there...this kinda situation was long lost for ages ago...good for this bunch of small kids!! at least their growing times was healthy and filled wif warm happiness unlike me,was a growing route dt no one wish to go on...

Later bout 4sumthing, join looloo and yoon for a tea break at old town,jusco s2..having a great time to gossip around..laughing out loud..so relief...cz had been tens for so many days..coming bak to hometown, its a moment to let go myself de...overall, its a kinda relaxing day for me after so long..and going for a movie at mbo, Orphan..kinda excited de.. =)

Last night,its kinda psycho too de...purposely follow baobao's sis with zhulee go kajang eat satay...walau~~ really yeng o~~along the journey, talked bak about each other past..aikz..realizing dt, all guys juz have the same reason to juz end up a relationship..and all guys will just gonna be damn sweet..willing to sacrifice everything to fulfill their lovers needs ..but once no more love in them to their lover, they cud jz become very cruel...very mean...and become a person who you dun even seems to noe them...with a glimpse,they cud jz become a brand new person.. this is wad guys will do..this is how love meant to them...aikz...a creature which I doubt..a creature that I truly cud hardly trust anymore...

Vinns